I’ve been working full time in the hospital for almost 3 years now, not counting the 3 years of internship at Cedars Sinai. but all of the sudden, I could not understand the concept of death.
I was very close to my grandma during my childhood years. I remembered I always stayed at my aunt’s house when school was not in session, my uncle would pick me up from my house, spending days or even weeks at their place. My grandma and I shared a room and we would talk until we were both too tired to stay awake, and I always remembered she liked to put sesame oil onto her foot corns, and told me to not tell anyone as my aunt wasn’t too excited about that idea.
I realized I was quite spoiled by her because she always bought me anything that I wanted and would tried to satisfied me in any possible way. She would also talked to me about my parents, complain about my dad and my other relatives for hours without realizing I wasn’t very interested in her topics. Sometimes I just kept nodding my head and pretend I was still paying attention, and sometimes I couldn’t stand it anymore and she would get mad at me.
Unfortunately we didn’t have a chance to spend quality time together after my mom and I moved to the U.S. from Hong Kong, and few years later my grandma immigrated to Canada with my aunt and uncle. One thing for sure is that my grandma loved being in Canada, and was grateful she had my aunt and uncle to take care of her. Few years later, My aunt, uncle and my grandma, was baptized together in the same church.
For some reason there was a voice in my heart, telling me I really needed to go back to visit them earlier this year. which I was so glad we did. My grandma was still able to walk, eat and laugh, despite the fact that she was already living in a nursing home, due to the fact that her Alzheimer’s Disease was deteriorating. But she could still remember me.
Until her health was really going downhill, she was not able to eat or drink on her own. She wasn’t able to recognize me although it’s been only half a year, but she always had a smile on her face, greeting me with her hands that she could barely lift up, telling me she’s so sorry that I made a trip to see her. She hurried me to go back to work because I wouldn’t get paid if I don’t work. We kept telling her it’s holiday or it’s the weekend, so she wouldn’t worry about us, although she had no idea who I was.
My grandma had a blessed life. She was surrounded by her closest family and her church pastors until the very last minute. God had given her time to see my uncle after he came back from Hong Kong and right before she went to heaven (it’s a miracle because my grandma has asked about him almost everyday, and due to the nature of his job, he’s only in Canada half of the time. My uncle came back on Wednesday night, was able to see her on Thursday morning, and my grandma passed peacefully around noon). I could not be more grateful that I have seen her when she was still healthy earlier this year, and was able to see her 2 weeks before she passed away. I know she’s in a better place now, where I will be able to reunite with her one day.
